One time Polar Bear Club played a show with Third Eye Blind....

...and it makes for an incredibly dull and dissapointing story.....

Not that long ago I still had a pretty big chip on my shoulder. Trevor thought himself to be "too punk" for certain bands. It's not like I was running around with a tri hawk and an Aus Rotten back patch but, you know, too cool for school. Unbeknownst to me at the time was that fact I wasn't too cool for shit.

The first time I ever roadied for Marathon one of the dudes put Third Eye Blind's self titled record on the stereo. I didn't really know the dudes in the band too well so I just sat there dumbfounded and silently judged. I recall thinking "What the fuck? I thought this was a punk band! This isn't punk rock, this is music for sorority girls!" Turns out that train of thought is riddled with irony considering I don't listen to punk music. I've heard on Black Flag song in my life, hated it, and never listened to them again. Get over it. Side note, I think Nate at the time was pledging a sorority but that's neither here nor there. That day I believe we were headed towards Philadelphia for a show with No Trigger, The Break, and Wasteland that took place under a bridge. None of that matters though. What does matter is by the end of that van drive, I was in love with Third Eye Blind and I had a hard on for Stephan Jenkins. (and Licky)

Fast forward some years to either 2007 or 2008, I can't quite remember. Marathon was long gone, along with my bountiful head of hair/self esteem, and Polar Bear Club was starting to tour more and more. Thanks to our friend Justin from Fire When Ready and other bands I haven't kept up on, PBC was given the opportunity to open up for 3EB at Oswego University. The show was to take place in an arena type setting where hockey games and other large events were held. There would be literally thousands of people in attendance basking in Goose's inner and outer beauty. (Quick! PBC dudes, Goose was in the band then, right!?) Everyone in PBC was a fan of the band at that time which added to the overall excitement of the offer. In fact, around the same time, PBC had been playing a Third Eye Blind cover at a couple of local shows. So it goes without saying that PBC enthusiastically accepted the show offer to rub elbows with Jenkins and their fruity looking guitar player. The day of the show the previously mentioned enthusiasm began to wane.

As I mentioned before, the show took place at a large venue at Oswego University, the exact college where I spent the best ten years of my life pursuing my Bachelor Of Arts in Fucking Up. Cue the Tommy Boy quote -

Tommy: Did you hear I finally graduated?
Richard Hayden: Yeah, and just a shade under a decade too, all right.
Tommy: You know a lot of people go to college for seven years.
Richard Hayden: I know, they're called doctors.

I knew I wasn't going to know any students but I was looking forward to being the oldest person on campus not named professor. As expected, the show was a pretty big production involving trailers worth equipment and one specific 18 wheeler designed to house the guitar player of Third Eye Blind's ego. Hired to load and unload all of the musical gear were a pack of surly failed musicians doubling as stage hands and roadies who made it a point to shit on all of us right in front of our faces.

We're all professionals so the lot of us showed up pretty early in order to feel the situation out since an event this size was new to all of us. Around this time, a more than likely coked up stage hand "greeted" us and figured we were one of the opening bands since we all wore skinny jeans. Um, ok. "Sorry, sir. I know you're used to a bunch of 40 year old dudes who wear rings on their fingers, are out of touch with any type of reality and probably think overalls, Skidz, eye brow rings, and Zack Morris are the new hip thing. Afterall, Stephan Jenkins actually wears a top hat while on stage. Cool as James Dean." Sure, not a complete slap in the face but this is the same stage hand that would later yell at PBC, telling them to "get their shit together as if this were some battle of the bands. (Side note, if it were, PBC would have lost, 3EB rulz!)

It wasn't all bad though, I have to admit it was pretty sweet to have our own dressing room filled with up with a bunch of food, that certainly was a perk. Of course our area was completely on the other side of the building, tucked away from Third Eye Blind, ensuring they wouldn't interact with the common folk. But sometimes fate steps in and two artists, two visionaries are brought together. Well, almost. The second best event of the evening took place backstage when Goose was on the hunt for some sort of glazed ham or sandwich, not sure which. The legend goes that Goose walked by the guitarist of Third Eye Blind who felt the need to put his hand to his face in order to shield his celebrity from superfan Goose. "Please, sir. Goose wasn't even alive when Semi Charmed Life was on the radio, he's not going to blow you. It's not like you're the lead singer of New Found Glory. And if you were, well, Goose would have a better tale to tell."

Oh, right. I guess Polar Bear Club played a set that night in front of thousands of kids. I felt warm and fuzzy inside while on side of the stage thinking about the first time I heard 3EB and how that day Nate played under a bridge to about ten people. All these years later. Still Nate. Still Third Eye Blind. Still no one caring. Even better than that though was the actual best event of the evening. Watching and seeing Chris Browne pump his fist, urging a crowd of non believers to "Sing it!!" No, wait. It was definitely walking by the previously mentioned hateful stagehand and hearing him desperately scream into his walkie talkie - "We lost the top hat! We may have left the top hat on the stage!" It was either Stephan's or Jimmy's.

It's Summer!

Well, it feels like summer here, it's around 80 degrees. You know what that means, right? Summer means Grey Area! Download here, fools! (password is strenght) Anyway, I fly out to meet up with Polar Bear Club on Friday and the West Coast shows start a couple days later. Me? Well, I've just been sitting around here working full time and dying inside more and more each shift. Kids, don't ever get a job. It will destroy you faster and harder than any girl. See you soon!

"Home Is Where The Heart Aches"

Well, it's just you and I again, kids. I feel we've had this very same conversation before. Once again, I have nothing going on here and I have zero to actually write about. So why am I doing it you ask? Mostly because I have about 45 more minutes left of work to kill. Yep, I'm back in New York state as of last Friday and yep, I'm back at my soul devouring, spirit killing job as a counselor. Eh, wait, the soul devouring part isn't true. I actually signed over my conscience/soul to my college roommate in 2001 for a Marlboro Light cigarette. Looking back I made the correct choice. But please know that every time I step into this office, another piece of me dies. Sound good?

Polar Bear Club. Maybe you've heard of them. Well, they're still in Seattle recording their follow up to "Sometimes Things Go One Track Too Long". Let's hope they don't pull a Stryder and release a second full length along the lines of "Jungle City Twitch". If you get that joke, you're too old to be reading this blog. But seriously, I've heard some pre-production songs and I'm really excited to hear everything come together in the end. I think Nate told me they were actually starting vocals today but I may have made that up, who knows. Even though they're plugging along, Polar Bear Club is also falling apart without me. For instance, Jimmy tells me dishes are starting to pile up in the studio kitchen. If I was there, I wouldn't let that happen. I keep house better than any soccer mom. Apparently, Emmett had a brief stay in an urgent care center. If Trevor was still in Seattle I'd have Emmett nursing at my teat and back in tip top shape in a matter of minutes. Don't under estimate my teats. The van. PBC's transportation has been stuck in a garage getting the breaks worked on for about a week now. If Seattle was still my home....no, wait, fuck that. I don't do vans but you already knew this, didn't you?

As I mentioned in my last entry, there was nothing for me really to do in Seattle unless you count eating five grilled cheese sandwiches a day and staring at a computer for ten straight hours activities. Wait, when other PBC-ers were in the actual studio, I did sneak off numerous times a day, to the bathroom, in order to treat my body as if it were some sort of amusement park. The sort of amusement park that has been foreclosed and neglected for years. Think lots of sad clowns and a rollercoaster that was shut down due to a couple kids being decapitated. It's ok, I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore. There was still the highlight of the PBC, Have Heart, Shook Ones, Comadre, and Rotting Out show. Shook Ones are one of my favorite current bands and it was great to catch up with all of the Have Heart dudes again after not seeing them for a couple weeks. It would have been nice to speak with Pat Flynn for a bit but he rolls with an entourage so deep it was literally impossible to get within 30 feet. This is what happens when hardcore goes to your heads, kids. Don't be like Pat.

The actual show took place at a VFW hall and brought out over 200 kids. Shook Ones went over great which was no surprise since Seattle is their home town. I felt the response to PBC was a bit apathetic which was a shame because they played one of their best shows ever musically. Of course Have Heart headlined and turned the venue into one large calesthenics class with all sorts of dudes moshing all over eachother. I took it all in from a very safe distance behind the merch table and sung the two lines I know to that one song.

So now that we got all the basics out of the way, let's get to the real point of this entry. Basically, I went ahead and signed up for a Twitter account. Why? I have no fucking idea. Wait, I do know. Jimmy and Goose did it first. That and I can now keep up on the day to day activities of Shaquille O'neal, Michael Showalter and an even more fictional version of Buffy from Buffy The Vampire Slayer. A sadder sentence has never been typed. Should you "follow" me? No, probably not. Unless of course you want to read such riveting updates as "not fucking" or "drinking until I pee the bed...again". Yes, I'm aware that Twitter is a tool mostly used by pre teens girls and believe me, I'm embarrassed. Ever see that episode of "The Office" where Creed dyes his hair black in order to appear younger? Well, this is the same type of desparate act. So, I guess this is me now.

I'm not one to judge but if you do choose to check out my profile on Twitter, do know you're following a person who took about six years to graduate college due to substance abuse, once drank a shot glass of his own urine to impress a girl (she wasn't impressed), and a "man" that lists his favorite actors as Sylvestor Stallone and Keanu Reeves. Hey, you're the ones who have to live with yourselves, do what you want. www.twitter.com/xtrackerx

Alright, I'm meeting up with the PBC boys in Seattle on May 1st for the West Coast dates. See you then. Tweet, tweet.

"I Spend Half My Time With Friends, Hoping It Never Ends"

So today is the first day of recording in the city of Seattle. Well, PBC is actually just doing what's called pre production. I wasn't really sure what that meant so I asked Goose. Goose's face glazed over as soon as I said "pre" and his only reply was "I love ham" so I then asked Nate. Nate tells me it's basically playing PBC songs for the producer, Matt Bayles, and a bunch of brain storming. Well, then my face glazed over because sitting in a room with Polar Bear Club sounded about as appealing as living a healthy lifestyle filled with good decisions. So, what I did was set up camp in the living room part of the studio and hop on the internetz. Well, eight hours later I'm still in here and they're still in there.

We actually rolled into Seattle last night after spending three or four days in Portland, Oregon. Not surprisingly, I went on a bit of an alcohol binge while in that city but I can't be blamed for my actions because I'm only an adult by default. Seeing our friends in Broadway calls, Chris P (thanks for the bbq!), our host Aaron, and Chip whom we met while on tour with American Steel only added to the antics and fun of our stay. (That sentence was a grammar holocaust) Previously, I mentioned the Broadway Calls, PBC, Attica! Attica! basement show that came together rather quickly while we were in town. I hadn't been to a basement show in awhile and I was told there would be no alcohol so I was pretty skeptical as to if I would enjoy myself. See, the thing is, I only look out for myself. I wasn't concerned with anyone else. This is why I soon die alone.

Either way, much to my delight, basement shows still entertain me. Maybe it was the fact that almost 50 kids came out on a show that was barely promoted. Maybe it was the fact that I knew everyone performing that night. Maybe it was the 40 ounce that I pounded in the van before the show. We will never know. What I did figure out though was that basement shows still give me goosebumps, Attica! Attica! deserves to be one of the biggest bands in punk rock, and that you're never too old to particiapte in an event that has is a part of your lifestyle. I'm talking about basement shows, kids, not alcohol addiciton.

Day one of my week long exodus in Seattle is almost over. Soon, I fly home to Rochester, New York in order to work a bit while Polar Bear Club slaves over their art. From what I've heard, I'm pretty excited about the new record. Hopefully, it blows up and I can someday get an apartment again. Wait. Ok, hopefully, the record blows up and I can afford a real bed to keep at my parent's house. Wait. Maybe Polar Bear Club gets huge and I can make a minium monthly payment on one of my four credit cards. Dare to dream, kids. That's it for now, I have to attend to some very pressing matters such as check my Myspace and Facebook for the 30th time today. Hey, if anyone in the Seattle area wants to hang out with a creepy old man with the social skills of an aborted fetus, hit me up!

Fun Ends Now

Well, all shows are done until April, 9th when PBC plays in Seattle with Have Heart, Shook Ones, Comadre, and Rotting Out.Today is April 2nd which means I have absolutely nothing to do for the next week. Sure, I haven't really done anything since I started touring with PBC but this time it feels different.

Right now we're all hanging out in Portland, Oregon at our friend Aaron's place. You may know Aaron from such bands as Attica! Attica! and the best band of all time other than As Friends Rust, Marathon. If you're an avid reader of this blog you may also remember the last time we stayed at Aaron's house. if you don't, just know that I took erotic pics of Goose in all sorts of sexy costumes. Collectively, we can only hope round two happens tonight.

Polar Bear has a couple days until recording for their new album begins so I guess they're going to practice here a couple days before we head to Seattle. Don't tell anyone but PBC, Broadway Calls, and Attica! Attica! are playing a super secret house show in the area tomorrow so I'm looking forward to that. However, like I mentioned before, after the show, I won't have shit to do. The eternal question of how many times can a grown masturbate within one day before imploding will finally be answered.

So, I've started drinking whiskey and I'm going to try and keep this entry short. Jimmy, Goose, and Aaron have left the apartment and are on their way to see Lil Wayne and Gym Class Heroes whereas the rest of the crew are sitting around watching YouTube videos such as "On A Boat" which wasn't even funny the first 50 times I was forced to sit through it. Yes, they're going to see Lil Wayne. Apparently, Aaron still knows a couple of dudes in Gym Class Heroes so the tickets were free. Personally, I'd rather drink my own urine (again) than see a Lil Wayne concert but Goose has an addiction to black ass so I'm not going to judge.

There was no point in writing this entry, I'm sorry. Listen to Reviver.